If you are thinking about what to do for your next celebration, let us tell you!
This past weekend, I had the privilege of being a guest at a family Bar Mitzvah. Knowing full and well what the family is going through to prepare and execute this massive event, one wants to lay low, act independently, and if called upon to help, be timely, decisive and accurate...
But, when large #'s family members actually get together, the results offer new and unanticipated challenges...
In this case I learned, much too slowly, the importance of 'keeping an eye on my room key'.
I was staying with my cousin and early in the morning on the day of the Bar Mitzvah, specifically 5:58 AM, someone was desperately trying to get into the house. Phones are ringing and doors are banging. I just assumed my cousin, with whom I had not stayed with in many years, had 24/7 friends, so I rolled over and let him 'deal with it'. He ultimately answered the door and in walks another relative from 3000 miles away who thought it would be 'fun' to decline his invitation and 'surprise' us. All I'm thinking is 'another one in line for the shower'...
Act Two (or the neighbors wondering "Who's the psycho lady in the street in a bathrobe?"):
'Surprise guy' had left his luggage in his car and realizes such AFTER kicking me from the bathroom and immersing himself under the shower spout... And noisily and desperately he yells from the bathroom and sends me out to his car to get his suitcase. Well... the door had closed behind me and of course... I am locked out... with suitcase in hand and wearing only a bathrobe. A second rescue by same cousin, who fortunately, was no longer under water in his shower. Whew!
No End in Sight (or Bring your own key or stick with someone who has one.):
The synagogue service was over. Bar Mitzvah boy is now a MAN, speeches are done, hugs and kisses exchanged, and father of Bar Mitzvah boy is holding an inventory of envelopes in his breast pocket and silently is wishing that he could keep it all to help pay the invoice for the day. We all are free for a few hours until the BIG party that evening. I had ridden to the synagogue with cousin and 'surprise guy', who reveals that he had only come for a short time and must get to the airport. Well, cousin wants to visit elsewhere, and I want to go home. So, 'surprise guy' agreed to take me back to the house on his way to the airport. We arrived with a small cushion of time to make the flight and only then realized that cousin had our only house key between the three of us. This most challenging rescue required a dash to another cousin's home where a spare key had been staged after a myriad of frantic phone calls.
Perfect Practice Makes Perfect (or Who's the homeless guy without the shirt?):
Once back in the house, I went to change clothes and 'surprise guy' was rushing to get himself together for his flight... Or, so I thought... Yet ANOTHER knock at the door... NOW WHAT?? I open it to find him standing there shirtless and once again, locked out. Apparently, he found it necessary to iron his shirt before leaving for the airport. (This, in itself, is quite a bizarre way to spend limited time cause who, in a hurry, really needs to wear a freshly pressed shirt to sleep on an airplane? WHATEVER!!) Apparently, in his search for the ironing board and iron, he had wandered beyond the confines of the locked fortress....
Perhaps I learned something? YES! There's very good reasons for lots of alcohol followed by loud music and the complete inability to hear one another in conversation. But, never assume you'll stick with the cousin with the key :-)
A Message to Our Hosts:
You took charge of everything, You told us where to go and when to be there. You planned our meals, our entertainment, and who we should sit with. You told us what to wear, chose our music and party favors. You shared great speeches, granted numerous honors and expressed enormous gratitude to us for coming from so far away... We loved it all, and thank you. We hope you are enjoying this 'back-story' :-)
After all this, invaluable advice from a seasoned travel professional:
- When checking in, ask for as many room keys as possible.
- Be sure to stage reliable cousins in the area with extra room keys.
- Reconsider answering the door in the middle of the night.
- Pay it forward by sharing your story.
And finally, I'll close with wise words written and recited by the Bar Mitzvah boy... a fine reiteration of his studies and lessons learned:
"...one mitzvah really interested me. It is the LAW of the “Rebellious Son”. “When parents have a difficult son who does not obey his father and mother, they shall discipline him. If the son refuses to listen, gets drunk, and eats like a pig, and the community agrees that he cannot be controlled, the men of the community shall stone him to death. In this way you will remove the evil influence, and the young people of Israel will hear about the punishment, be afraid, and in turn, be respectful and obey their parents”. But, according to the rabbis, a rebellious child has never been stoned to death, and this punishment does not really exist. So I asked myself, if this has never happened in history, why is this law in the Torah? After thinking about this question, I realized this “law” is just to scare children into behaving! I managed to turn 13 without getting stoned to death... " JK August 29, 2015
It's probably appropriate to close with a quote an often used by 'surprise guy':
"That's my story and I'm sticking to it."
What's yours? Call me and
I'll help you create it :-)
Joyce
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